Take care of Me

Morning Yall

Happy day after the new moon!

Hello! I hope you are doing well. I wanted to let you know that the new moon on July 17th had an illumination of 0%. That means it was not illuminated by the sun at all. However, the illumination is always changing and can vary up to 10% a day. On July 17th, the moon was 29.29 days old, which refers to how many days it has been since the last new moon. It takes 29.53 days for the moon to orbit the earth and go through all 8 moon phases.

The new moon in Cancer is a great time to focus on personal goals that reflect the positive energies of the Crab. These can include honoring our deepest, most intimate feelings; recognizing the sense of safety and security we find in our homes; allowing ourselves to accept support and offering support to others; and starting a project that will improve our domestic lives or a long-term venture.

With the strong Cancer energy surrounding us, we have the opportunity to make important changes that will benefit us long after this moon cycle. So let's make some plans and set the stage for success. Whether it's a small or big change, we can start reaping the benefits approximately two weeks after the full moon occurs. Let's focus on new ways to enhance family life and domestic affairs, and to build up our feelings of security and safety.

Because this new moon is opposite Pluto, we should be careful not to overdo things or act out of fear. We might face resistance or obstacles that push us to start fresh. However, this new moon also harmonizes with Neptune, which means our inspiration will support our efforts to begin anew.

This phase of the moon occurs at 24 degrees and 56 minutes of Cancer, affecting people with personal planets and points at approximately 21 to 29 degrees of the cardinal signs (Aries, Cancer, Libra, and Capricorn) most significantly. You can see the moon best in the west after the sun sets. This is the first phase after the new moon and a great time to observe the features of the moon's surface. The moon is close to the sun in the sky and mostly dark except for the right edge of the moon, which becomes brighter as the days get closer to the next phase, which is a first quarter with 50% illumination.

It's time to take a good look at the intentions and wishes you set during the new moon rituals. This is also the perfect time to attract and seize opportunities when they arise. Enjoy the new beginnings.

I personally have been greatly affected by the energies of the new moon in Cancer. The past two weeks have been slightly stressful, coming from the whole travel debacle into the holiday July 4th. This then brought me into the worrisome task of caring for someone near and dear to me, of whom I usually do not have to care. It all becomes especially straining when someone you love doesn't want to take care of themselves as well as you wish they would. I still have a full-time job at the florist, still have a life, and still suffer from sometimes crippling anxiety as well as PTSD. All of this taken into consideration makes for a bit of a hectic mind. My intrusive thoughts are in overdrive production status, and sometimes I cannot even sit down long enough to catch my breath.

At the same time, I am dealing, I have been attempting to just be. To manifest no stress and take on less of what others need to do and take care of me. This Cancer new moon showed up like a beacon from a lighthouse, coming across the shore leading me to exactly the process I need to resolve my mindset issues. My responsibilities were abounding this weekend, with the job of caring for my loved one, there were groceries and such. With no problem at all, I got everything done by Sunday night. I had time to write and even play with Nala for a little while. Yet I still felt that ick of being displeased with myself. I realized it was the intrusive thoughts mixed in with my insecurities. The feeling that arises from my co-dependency. The feeling that if I cannot fix it, it cannot be fixed. The ever-existing power struggle between the left and right sides of my brain. The voice that says, “you need to get your shit together Wonder.” It always makes me feel like there is no light at the end. Does anyone else ever feel that way?

As I lay in bed on Sunday, exhausted emotionally, physically, and mentally, I did a Yoga Nidra meditation. I began to scan my body, piece by piece. While I scanned, I started to take inventory, like I do most nights, but this was a bit different. I found my thoughts that were passing through my mind like clouds to be not so negative or accosting. They were usually self-critical and harsh. They are reminders of what I need to get done, how I may have hurt someone, or just those normal self-deprecating diddies. Not on this night, this time it was quite refreshing. I was able to see how I failed if I did, analyze the actions I took, and rightfully process the information… so much that I fell asleep.

That is what Nidra is for anyway, right?

I woke up yesterday, still worried about current situations. However, I was able to just get up, put one foot in front of the other, and do the next things I needed to accomplish. I soon realized that I had been so on the ball that I was done with everything…

Everything but taking care of myself.

I will preface this with, I LOVE to isolate. I adore alone time, and darkness I truly believe is my safe place. However, I can get stuck there, so I do my absolute best to NOT reside in isolation. I am aware it adds to my stress and anxiety when not dosed in moderation, one of my favorite words. Yet on this fine day, it was raining when I went to take Nala out to pee. I then made her breakfast, procured a glass of ice water, and headed back downstairs to my wing of the house. I turned my fan on high, opened my Apple TV, and started to watch the two movies I downloaded: Blade Runner and Blade Runner 2049. Both are in my top 20 of all time, and I had not made time to sit and watch them.

I relaxed, walked slow, handled myself with care.

One of my best homies brought me a thermometer so I could keep better track of the temperature of my patient, so I never even had to leave my house. I also got a ride from the same person to go get a black bean cheesy Gordita crunch from Taco Bell. They have so many great vegetarian options!

As I laid my head on the pillow, I did not toss or turn. I looked at my pup, right in her eyes, and told her just how grateful I am to have her in my life. I rubbed her belly until I fell asleep. Now, I never used to have nights like this. I have always had insomnia and issues of one or another that hindered my sleep as well as my life. This was once again refreshing. I woke up this morning not filled with dread, ready to take on the day. Which is a HUGE step for me. I don't expect it to always stay this simple or be as easy to breathe, but man, I could get used to this, for sure.

As always, I love you for reading ,

Be Well

Wonder